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Relationship Checking Account

Dear Friend,

One of the most important lessons I ever learned about dog training is the one I'm about to share with you.  I learned it about ten years ago while attending a seminar.

I can't remember who said it, but it has stayed with me for a long time.

It has helped me many, many times when I have taught dog owners how to apply it.

When I first started training dogs I learned from some very harsh trainers.  I was taught to punish any behavior I didn't like.  I was taught to use force to teach dogs obedience.

Many of the dogs that were trained this way would eventually show signs of aggression, or they would just start to shut down.  You could see changes in their behavior.

All of this was very depressing to me.

Until...

I learned about the Relationship Checking Account.  You see, your dog is a product of his or her environment.  If a dog is brought up in an angry, aggressive household - there is a very good chance that the dog will become aggressive.

Think of it this way.  Every time you do something negative to your dog (yell, scruff shake, smack, leash correction, etc.), you are making a withdrawal from your Relationship Checking Account.

Every time you do something positive (pet, play, treat, feed, etc.), you are making a deposit.

Here's the important point.  You have to make more deposits than withdrawals in your Relationship Checking Account.

If you have more withdrawals than deposits, the relationship with your dog will bounce faster than a hot check!

Think of the relationships you have with your friends or relatives.  Have you ever avoided a phone call from someone you know because all they will do is nag or complain.  Have you ever told someone you were "too busy" because you knew that going somewhere with them would be dreadful.

We have Relationship Checking Accounts with everyone we know.  If a relationship is filled with deposits we will spend and enjoy our time with those people.

If the relationship is filled with withdrawals, we will lie, procrastinate, and avoid spending time with those people.

Your dog is stuck with you.  We will all have to make withdrawals at some time.  It happens in any relationship, but we want to make sure that we have made enough deposits so the Relationship Checking Account won't bounce.

All the best,

Eric Letendre, Professional Dog Trainer

Eric R. Letendre
Bay State Dog Training


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